What if the very thing you’re clinging to in co-parenting, the need for control, is what’s keeping you from peace?
In this episode, Michelle Dempsey-Multack unpacks why control in co-parenting is an illusion, how expectations create unnecessary heartache, and what true surrender looks like for divorced parents. Listeners will learn how to shift from frustration to freedom and create a calmer, more resilient environment for their children.
What You’ll Learn:
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Why co-parents crave control after divorce and how it impacts anxiety
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The difference between healthy influence and harmful attempts to control
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How to respond when your ex behaves in ways you can’t change
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Tools for modeling resilience and stability for your children
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A practical exercise to release control and focus on what really matters
Episode Highlights:
- 00:00 – Why control feels like the only safety net after divorce
- 02:05 – The truth: you can’t control your ex, your child’s emotions, or transitions
- 05:15 – How expectations create self-fulfilling frustration
- 08:40 – What letting go really looks like in day-to-day co-parenting
- 11:25 – Surrender as freedom: shifting energy into peace, healing, and presence
- 13:30 – Final reflection: modeling resilience for your children
Tools, Frameworks, or Strategies Mentioned:
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The “Expectation Audit” Exercise – writing down one thing you can’t control in co-parenting, and one thing you can control.
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Modeling Resilience Framework – showing kids strength and calm through action rather than reacting to negativity.
Closing Insight:
“Your power as a parent doesn’t come from controlling every variable; it comes from modeling grace, resilience, and love.”
Letting go of control isn’t giving up, it’s reclaiming peace. Take a deep breath, release what isn’t yours to manage, and focus on what truly matters: showing up for your children with stability and love.
Learn from Michelle how to navigate divorce & co-parenting: https://bit.ly/MDMPodStore
Get one-on-one coaching from Michelle: http://stan.store/themichelledempsey/p/book-a-11-zoom-with-me-wt46q75a
Subscribe to our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@TheMichelleDempsey
Website – https://michelledempsey.com/
Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/michelle645
TikTok – https://www.tiktok.com/@themichelledempsey1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mldempsey/
LINK TO TRANSCRIPT: https://transcripts/moving-on-method-ep263-letting-go-of-control-in-co-parenting
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