“You seem like you’ve got
co-parenting all figured out.
Bella is so lucky!”

I saw this in my DM’s the other day.
Funny how social media can make our lives seem like something entire different than the reality that we’re living.

I mean yea, I’m not gonna lie – Bella’s dad and I have come a LONG way in our co-parenting journeys. We’re more amicable (most of the time), I’m more at peace with the reality of our situation (only having Bella 50% of the time), and I enjoy (most) of my time when she’s not with me.

BUT I STILL STRUGGLE.
A LOT OF THE TIME.
BECAUSE CO-PARENTING ISN’T ONE SINGLE HURDLE TO GET OVER.
IT’S A MILLION TINY ONES.

Look, if you’re expecting co-parenting to “finally” get easy. You need to realize that co-parenting, like parenting, is never going to be easy. There will be less challenging times where you think to yourself, “Damn. this isn’t so bad,” and then all of a sudden your child or children will hit a tough spot in their lives where you and your ex will have to kick things into overdrive, scrambling to figure things out in two different homes.

What I’m trying to say here, is:

There is no way to have co-parenting all figured out, just like there is no way to have ANYTHING all figured out. We are humans living in a constantly evolving world, which means we need to continue rolling with the punches, adapting to what life gives us, and accepting that sometimes, the weight of the world might pull us under.

That’s okay. Hitting a co-parenting wall doesn’t make you a bad mother. It doesn’t change the amazing life your children have ahead of them.

It makes you human.

So give yourself some grace, which is exactly what I had to do this week with my own personal co-parenting snag.

When co-parenting fees especially hard, I get incredibly down on myself, but here’s what I do to feel better:

– Grab a journal
– Write down the last time co-parenting made me feel like this
– Jot down what I did to get through this snag; what helped me through, how long it took, etc.
– Make a promise to myself that this too shall pass, because it has before, and it will again.
Happy Saturday!

xx,
Michelle